Kids are Driving Me Nuts And I’m Seriously About To Lose My Shit.

11 Feb

I wish I could blame it on the fact that I’m a full time single mom, but I’m pretty sure this goes for everyone.

I don’t like my kids right now. I don’t like them so much right now, that there was a moment of hate that I felt towards them. Granted it was fleeting and totally internalized, only those that could see the invisible smoke coming out of my ears and hear the old school cartoon red train whistle blowing, would know. But I felt it. Normally I would make self-deprecating jokes about it and say things under my breath to them like, “Where’s mommies drink helmut?” Or, “What’s a little kahlua in a 6 a.m. coffee on a Thursday?” But, I wasn’t feeling jokey. The humor I am usually able to find in these types of situations was no where to be found. A barren ground of funny where the air is so tight and thick, I couldn’t even throw something or slam something shut. I was immobilized.

They had thrown the annoying dart at my last nerve. And I wanted to lose it, but couldn’t.

It’s all the better. I’ve never been able to successfully throw an adult tantrum. The few times I’ve lost it and I mean totally lost it (not raised my voice and slammed the car door lost it), I mean top of the lungs yelling, throwing backpacks into their places, tossing dishes into the sink and roughly returning toys to their appropriate boxes; all the while rambling about all the things that I do for them, how ungrateful they are, loudly reminding them that they have been exhausting ALL day and then ending with a red faced, wild haired, “Why are you HERE?”!!!!

The three times in seven years that I have TOTALLY lost it, has never gone well. I once tossed the remote back into it’s box on the table and it bounced off and shattered into pieces, simultaneously denting the table. Then, one time, while making a point, I slammed the fridge closed so hard, that as soon as it shut, I hear the clunk and crash of the door barriers coming unhinged and all the condiments now spilled and broken. (Could I get a better metaphor for that moment?) Or when I was aggressively putting the furniture back into it’s place after “fort time” was SO over and the cushy sofa square landed on my toe, showing me my anger and reminding me of it for days after.

So, I’ve learned, that the only person that truly is punished by me losing it, is me. The kids grow quiet, yes but not because they are ashamed of their behavior and plan to change it but because they are stunned and probably a little weirded out by this sudden crazy person that has clearly taken over their mother’s body.

So, today when I get to that point, I know better and this only infuriates me more. I had no… release. No out. No end product. No ultimate warning to my kids that seriously, you guys. Shit is going down.  

I don’t hit or spank my kids. I never have and I never will. (Here is where I would say that I don’t judge anyone who does, but that’s untrue. I totally judge people that spank their kids. For one, it’s doesn’t work. When have you ever said to someone, “wow. your kids are so well behaved, what’s your secret?” and they return with a “Oh, we spank them”. I’m guessing never. In fact the parents I know that do spank their kids are the ones with the kids that are usually the most out of control. But that’s a different article and a comment section I’m not willing to endure today.)

So, today. It was safe to say, I was losing my shit and the thing was;  they weren’t doing anything really out of character. I mean, they were acting exactly how two happy, excitable, post sugar intake, long day inside because of the rain siblings should act. But never the less, they were bugging the shit out of me. I was close to losing it after my son held his sister down and farted into her eye, but it wasn’t until the smell hit me, where I had HAD it. “DUDE!” I said as they both rolled into fits of giggles, which prompted more gas to be passed and normally I would roll my eyes, stifle a laugh (or gag reflex) and leave the room, but for some reason, the smell made me angry.

But then they were laughing hysterically. Together. Every second or two looking at my face, to see if my obvious disdain was passing. It’s like they were in cahoots together. They were a team. A team of pure antagonistic annoying’ness, but a team.

And most of the days go by with them bugging each other, and so in the middle of my pure anger towards them, I settled down and like some creepy Lifetime Movie mom, smiled at them instead and let them have their moment of grossing their mom out, together, as partners. The buddy system. And I was just glad that they were getting along so well.

I played it off, “You guuuuyyyyssss…gross!!” all the while, secretly, flipping them off in my mind. And it felt good. Felt even better to not have to sweep anything up after a total mom meltdown.

12 Responses to “Kids are Driving Me Nuts And I’m Seriously About To Lose My Shit.”

  1. Jessica August 10, 2014 at 3:32 am #

    I’m loosing my mind. I only have one kid, a 3 yr old son but he is soo much to handle. I’ve been so stressed out lately with financial troubles, car troubles, jumping through hoops with dhs to get him into preschool; just to name a few. I seriously feel like I’m loosing it. There’s been screaming, yelling, threats, cussing pretty much from both of us to eachother. I don’t deal with this much stress well and I can’t give him all the attention he desires so he’s acting out abd I have zero patience. I don’t know what to do. I jokingly say I’m gonna check myself in somewhere but its almost for real.

  2. SaraJ July 28, 2015 at 2:28 pm #

    First of all I’m also a mother. You didn’t raise them properly and you don’t sound fit to be a mother! You should’ve brought them up to not annoy you and frankly you actually sound like a 13 year old babysitter than a mother. Full time single mom? That’s called being a lazy scumbag! Get a job or you’re giving them a bad message. No I’m not single and my husband and I both work 40 hours a week! My sister is single with 3 kids and she works 35 hours a week. Get off welfare and get a job. Put those poor kids into care as you’re clearly not fit to be a mother and you’re just going to be horrific with them when they become teens and it will definitely psychologically damage their poor selves. You should’ve used a condom and failing that had an abortion. Keep your legs closed and don’t have any more! I pray for your kids!!!!!

    • 3stagesofgirl July 28, 2015 at 5:34 pm #

      Lol. This type of humor is not for everyone. This is a vent on one moment in one day in a year after speaking to countless moms. My kids are amazing. Thank you for your concern. 😉

    • WellIswell October 2, 2015 at 9:24 pm #

      Your an idiot. Go kill yourself 🙂

    • Katie March 4, 2016 at 3:58 pm #

      You need to grow up and stop judging someone are you serious right now? How disrespectful can you be to this lady who made this post. It’s disgusting excuses for human beings like You that need to keep your mouth and your disgusting legs closed you are a really terrible excuse for a woman and I have every right to say that due to what you said now go catch fire you devil woman

    • LindaL March 5, 2016 at 11:09 pm #

      Though you did not explicitly state whether you have children or not, you do not seem to have real experience in the world of parenting, besides observing your sister and her three children. I might even venture a guess and say you have put off becoming a mother….for whatever reasons, therefore you are not qualified to tell anybody else they are unfit. Get over your own bitterness about not being a mother and leave child-rearing to those who serve in that role.

    • 3stagesofgirl March 6, 2016 at 12:55 am #

      Wait? Who said I’m on welfare and don’t work? Full time single mom meaning I’m a full time single mom. I work full time in addition to. But I’m more concerned with how quick you were to see my post as ugly and Nasty and missed the parts of how I share my adoration for my kids. They are happy. I’m happy. But days aren’t perfect and I’m human and if you read properly you would see this was an internal struggle and that I was giggling and playing w them. I didn’t realize you and your sister were perfection (35 hours she works!? Well humph.. I’ve got another 25 on that so who is lazy now?)
      BUT I’m sure she’s doing the best she can and insure she’s lovely and with moments just like I expressed above. If she or you don’t have those moments that I’m sad for you because living in a facade as if everything is perfect.. Is why kids these days are can be little a holes… Usually just like their parents. I wish you love and an open heart and kindness. And sorry @saraj but you’re not very nice. When one person disagrees w u (me) then it’s my issue, when a few (at least) call you out on being awful… It’s you. Sad for you. And your husband and well.. You for being so hateful. But as always I take it in stride. I will always speak my truth .. The ugly too and find humour in the toughest parts.
      One thing I know for sure. Is my kids are happy, silly, goofy, loving, friendly and know they are adored by me. EVEN when they’re driving me nuts and I’m feeling like I might be losing my shit.
      Peace Sara j.

      • pale pink March 23, 2016 at 11:54 pm #

        3Stagesofgirl: I found your article because my 4 year old son is just driving me nuts today. I LOVE him dearly and I am just having a day where I’m over it. I thoroughly enjoyed your writing, instantly understood exactly what you were saying & decided that I like you SO much! Normally when this happens, I smile and then walk away from the computer, but today I saw Sara J’s comment and was blown away!!! What?! I would like to know what she did to raise her kids “not to annoy her” as that would be pretty valuable information. (LMAO). I have never heard of a full-time single mom being referred to as a ‘scumbag’ before! I work 32 hrs/wk, and quite frankly, those are my EASY hours. Taking care of my son, my home, endless responsibilities and shaping of a tiny human is the (obviously rewarding) HARD part of my week. Thank you so much for sharing with us, unfortunately there are CRAZY people out there that we must co-exist with. P.S. Sara J: The rest of us hate people like you. I hope your children will be nothing like you, and try to find the good in others despite the example given to them.

      • 3stagesofgirl March 24, 2016 at 12:20 am #

        Thank you. Hang in there. I have learned those types of people have the kids that my kids say are the mean ones. Thank you for your support and having a sense of humor!!!! 4 is tough.. Stay strong!!!

  3. Frank December 8, 2015 at 1:26 am #

    First off Sara J obviously doesn’t have children because if she did she’d understand the feeling of helplessness and frustration that comes with the territory. Anyway, I am feeling this way tonight with my kids and am taking a Daddy timeout right now. It is refreshing and soothing to know that we are not alone in our struggle to be good parents and to really know that there is no book for this. Thanks for sharing Jessica

  4. Nicole Bridges April 29, 2016 at 10:11 pm #

    Great Acticle! Thank you for not making feel like I’m not alone. I have 3 girls…They are 5, 7 and 9. They push my limits daily! SarahJ get a Life!

  5. Mother of Two June 8, 2016 at 3:47 pm #

    @SaraJ…STFU!!!!! Ugh your post just irritated the hell out of me. I am a stay at home mom I have a 25 month old and an 8 month old I work 40 hours a week remotely while watching my daughters 24/7 and sometimes feel like I want to shot my head off what the heck do you have to say about me i am unstable shouldn’t have had kids?? Where do you get off thinking you can speak to people the way you did. Even if i didn’t work and just was a stay at home mom do you have any idea what it’s like to take care of children on your own, without any help no breaks, no day care, running after the kids, cleaning up after them, feeding them, taking care of the house running errands? it isn’t easy you probably just go to work and just drop off your kids at the daycare facilities and have to be with them for what 5 hours before they need to go to bed and your routine starts all over again. don’t judge people you ignorant a hole!

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